It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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