Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
