I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize