His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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