i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
home. puking in laundry basket.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize