he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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