nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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