He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
