She's JV to your varsity
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize