why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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