It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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