I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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