If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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