Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Randomize
