Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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