just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize