I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
