I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
