i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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