Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
