if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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