Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
