ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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