i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
