Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I can't put those talents on a resume
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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