Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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