i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
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