don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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