I hate all girls vehemently.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
