its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize