Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Sex in the backyard? Check.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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