please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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