ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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