Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
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So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
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She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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