my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
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