playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
