And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
