so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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