alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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