I want to have your abortion
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'm like, not good at living.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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