..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
