He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
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Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
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Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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