Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
