Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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