I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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