I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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