just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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