I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
