i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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