I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
