Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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